sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- a keeper. Ah. Finally. Gold is struck. WG spent the night and we talked and chatted. I sulked a lil as he was overly tired and I was ... horny. I rolled over yet again and sulked and felt tears threatening my eyes wondering why this was happening. I let it go and tried to be friendly and rolled back over. That's when he came over and we started to kiss. And in that, we kissed for REAL. For real. It was nice and passionate, only later did I find out that he thought I was on my period - which is why he didn't touch me down below. He touched un-clothed boob and kissed me in a way I never thought he would. There is a sense of passion, a tinge of desperation? Longing? Not sure. His kiss says a lot, I could tell he was tired, but in a way, he bore down on my lips and held me to him, it was sweet. Regardless, he asked me to call my gyn monday - and ask about my birth control and sex. We both agreed me getting pregnet right now, would be horrible. So he wants to feel "safe" and yet, even if I'm told it's "okay" there is always a 5-7% chance. Always a chance. If condom is used the rate is so much lower, with birth control as a back up. I guess it's like having a double layer of protection, and just taking away a layer of it. Yet I feel, well I'm overweight and they say birth control doesn't work as well as with thin women. However, I've read that it's harder for overweight women to get pregnet. So it's a catch-22 in a sense. I want to have sex condomless as it's easier, however, do not want to risk an "accident." So I shall call my gyn and ask to speak with the nurse. Sort of nervous about such a conversation. "Hi I'm on birth control for my irregular periods, but now I'm wondering if I could use it for what it's intended for. What are my risks if I have unprotected sex?" I feel nervous. Anyway. He seems to feel that sex is coming up fast. Saying, the way we kissed last night .... Erm. Anyway, I ordered some of his easter gift today from old gravy. See they have extended men sizes ONLY on the net. So I got him a cute track suit - type of thing - and two tee-shirts. All in navy blue, teeshirt is a ringer in a blue, lined with navy blue and then an orange shirt, lined in a darker orange. All on clearence: 2 tee shirts, 1 track coat and a pair of sweats = $38. Not to shabby for the amount of clothing. His other easter gift might be a bottle of cologne, though not to sure. And I'll make him fudge - all in an easter basket. Anyway, we're doing well still and talked about the future again and about each other. He got up and I sat with legs dangling off the bed, he came and hugged me and I swore I could stay in that spot forever. My period is coming, and it's going to be ... bad ... I think. Cramping - and headaches - backache - nutty. Oh and WG is going to cancel games night with my ex :) next Saturday. I told my loving WG that "hey if you go to Games night, then that following weekend is the party for my sister, so I won't see you for two weeks!" In that he said he'd make up something and cancel. I'm thinking, oh yeah. He also said he knew he has to stop being friends with fuck face, though I don't know if he'll go through with it, might be guilted into things with my slimy ex. Still, my darling boy says he wants a small wedding. And wants us to have a honeymoon in Italy. Like a cruise type of thing. Anyway, I daydreamed on moving in with him. Though he seems not to even fathom such a thought. He still thinks our relationship is "young" though, I think we're beginning to become aged/grow and right now we're in transition and think this transition is now falling into love.
3:42 p.m. - 2006-02-26 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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