sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- and stuff. Ugh. Here is the conversation of choice: WG: I got in a fight with my mom the other day. *SHUTTER* Yeah. I know. It's like EEK. I mean I know I've been bitching and teasing him about meeting them ... but now I'm like fucking terrified!! I mean I've never met parents before. Should I bring flowers?? I think I should. It's just coffee and cake. Then MY OWN MOTHER, asked my sister yesterday (cause me and WG spend all day there doing wedding shit ...) my mom asked her .... "do you think he's the one? Do you think this is it?" My sister said she thinks so. WTF is going on!? WG spent the night last night. We messed around a lil - didn't do much as a yeast infection still lurked within. It's pretty much gone - but I am back on the remaining antibotic pills (two more days) and I am on my yeast infection pills just in case. I can't believe my sore throat came back. WTF is that? Still, I can say, home on a Saturday night, now TWO WEEKS IN A ROW w/o Wg spending the night, I'm missing him. Something has changed and we're closer or something. I think it's the intimacy part. This morning, I got up at 7 and told him to sleep in while I showered. It was funny as I washed my hair I could hear that boy snoring away. Geez. Afterwards I came out quietly and he woke up. I went and got a rice cake for breakfast and got in bed and leaned on him peering at him, crunching my rice cake. He laughed so hard and said, "god you're just like a child, I love it." We chatted a lil and brought up sex or something off handedly and I said, do you think you're back in the saddle? He said, yes and I feel like I'm ahead of the pack just running and running. I said, oh ... that's ... uh good. So he says, "yeah and ever time I kiss you I get hard." WHAT!?!?!? I said, oh ... that's ... uh good and we both laughed. I think I've created (creating) a monster or awakened something in this boy. Jeez. We talked the night before about what we did last week because we both were so shy about it. He said he loved it, and it got him so hot touching me. I was happy he could TALK about this stuff now. Though it's odd to hear that. So I think my confidence building stuff has helped ... last night I told him I could kiss him alllll night and a bunch of things ... and how good he did things. Just ... to boost his ego/confidence. We kissed and I was on top - cause I'm trying to learn that cause I never have been good at that. Though, it was incrediably HOT as I kissed him lightly that he pulled my head in and ... phewwwwwwww. I told him next Friday ... yeah .... we're going to mess around. I flubbed up on my diet too. Fuck. No excuses, but I've been incrediably busy and still AM busy as fuck. I cleaned up my apt while my sister worked on table cards. I have to just wash the kitchen/bathroom floor and then wash out the sink/tub in the bathroom. But I'm not doing that until LATER in the week. Also ... ugh ... will know Monday if I got that job or not. I know I didn't. Sorry. I know. No hope, pessimist. Whatever, realistic. Other than this, I'm so tired of wedding shit. Also wondering as WG said tomorrow we'd do something and ... er ... I told my sister I'd go shopping with her as I wanted to get something to wear when I meet WG's parents. I feel like I'm "over spending" right now. But ... in truth I haven't boughten anything except shit I need ... or bought dinner for everyone last night and gassed up my car. Big spender me. Right now, I wish WG would say that he loves me. Still with the LIKE. Not sure what he thinks is LOVE. He said before when the L word is used, everything changes...or was it ... when you have sex, everything changes? Not sure, but I'm sort of puzzled. Like why ... hasn't he said it or ... I don't know. He said everyone, even my ex, noticed how happy he is. And in a way, I just don't care about my ex anymore. I think I "let go" ... I mean I can't say I hate him anymore, just that I feel sorry for him. I mean I just don't care .... Eh. Still today...can I be a nerd and say how happy I am that I got to wash two carpets in my apt? I know that sounds gay, but my "winter" carpet where people wipe their shoes was utterly disgusting --- dirty. And my bathroom carpet just needed it. So I washed them and didn't pay for them to go in the dryer and am air drying them on my drying rack. Maybe that'll put some humidity in this dry ass apt. of mine. Tomorrow I'm lugging my kitchen rug (that everyone loves) to my sisters to wash. It needs it too. Something about CLEAN RUGS on a clean floor. It's like ... heaven to me. I guess I'm a neat freak. Okay sue me. Anyway, I guess I'm just happy too and wonder if it shows? Ugh. Okay time to get to bed. Didn't sleep well at all. Stressed and stuff. 10:27 p.m. - 2006-03-18 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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