sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- tired. I've been busy - like overloaded - as of recent. Ugh. It's 5 months until the wedding - TODAY. That means tomorrow is 4 months and some odd dayz. Kill me. Right now I'm "broke" again. I'm tired of this way of life. Granted it hasn't been this way ... but since we got a load of rock, birthdays/yardwork/etc., paying on wedding. It's been rough lately. It's caused me to sell 20 shares of stock from where I work. That'll give me $500. I plan to A. get my hair done ($150) and B. pay off wedding items. Another disturbing thang: went tux shopping with fiance and oddly and saddly we have to go to a place where they sell "portly short" tuxes. Coz my fiance is short and "portly" It's sad really and he was embrassed at the whole ordeal-o. But alas I said, "THIS IS WHY I AM LOSING WEIGHT." So yes I am losing weight and am on WW - though the past few days haven't been counting and have been eating not so good. However am active and doing stuff and cleaning/yard work. My parents come here Thursday and I have Friday off. I have days off peppered in each month ... yay. I'm burnt out with it all. So much that I keep losing my memory - can't remember shit. Mostly I get by...by ... the uh ... present time stuff. Future stuff... is hit or miss. I dont' even know if that made sense. Regardless, fiance is cool and I'm happy. We're getting ready to send out save the dates. I'm getting semi-nervous about it all, have horrorific thoughts of me breaking down and crying down the isle. I hate crying in public. Or "showing emotion in public." My goal is to not look at anyone but fiance. I've seen the man cry (he's very sensitive) .. so it doesn't really effect me. Argh, right now, I'm so wrapped up in the wedding I find it hard to even relax anymore. Going to exercise classes, minding the funds, taking care of house, dog, man.... job, work, stress. I dont' know how I do it sometimes. Regardless, I'll update here and there, but fuck I'm so tired. 9:14 p.m. - 2007-05-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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