sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- good things come to those who wait I GOT THE JOB. I finally, finally got out of my current job - that I've been trying to get out of, for four years. I will now be a graphic a r t i s t. At the largest gam ing ca si no in the US. I'm very happy, to say the least. I gave my two weeks last Thurs/Friday. I thought it would be the day of my dreams, that I'd relish in the fact that I would NO LONGER be fucked by my current employer. Yet I feel a slight sadness, an overwhelming sense of GUILT. But I'm trying to shake off these feelings and just be happy that I'll be make more money and better opportunities. I *was* making 28,000 (something 28,500 or something like that) ... now I am making 35,000! PLUS BONUSES. I'm excited, but this part of me feels very scared. I think the prospect of starting over is both thrilling and chilling. I mean it's GOOD now that I don't have folks asking me when I'm going to have a kid. But it's bad when I have to make ALL NEW FRIENDS. I mean ... talk about being the "new girl" for a while. The person people talk about at the water cooler. "Is she going to workout? What's her story?" I know ALL to well. Regardless, I AM HAPPY. EXCITED. THRILLED. More money! Yes please! However, my baby makin' obsession has been put on the back burner. Hubby is upset about that, but I'm not exactly quitting. I'm just slowing down on things. I am still taking my vitex and still on my progesterone cream. I still am charting. Well, I guess we're still trying, but not that hard? Does that make sense? Afterall, how would it look for me, getting a new job and a montly later be pregnant? Oh yeah, I forgot, the baby psychic *did* say that I wasn't going to conceive or give birth or find out until September. I told hubby that we won't stop trying, but won't be as ... well ... having sex as much as before! :) I told him I'd rather wait until after summer to really really try. For now, if it happens, it happens. So I guess it's not all bad. I just love the money thing, and able to pay off MORE bills. Just wonderful. And....to design again. I'm ... scared, but very excited! Especially when I can work my way around in this place and get to higher levels. Me...designing again. Me ... in a another creative position. It just feels good to have GOOD NEWS for once concerning my career. Also, my old boss for when I was a graphic artist at the paper - told me he's going to put in some of my pieces for this big contest. :) So hopefully, I will win those. :) That'd just be awesome. Still. It's just ... good good things going on. My only dark cloud is the past few days I've BLOWN my diet. My goodness. What the fuck was/am I thinking? I can't seem to stop? Happy eating? Stress? Oh well. I feel a cold coming on right now, so ugh! I hope it gets over quick! 8:20 p.m. - 2008-05-25 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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