sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Happen? I've been meaning to update for some time now. I started my new job and I really really am enjoying it! The perks and the benefits alone are simply amazing. So I'm very happy and stress is very very low. It's odd to be unstressed. My stress now is making it to work on time! I'm designing a lot of things and I'm really on mark this time. My designs have wow'ed a lot of people so far. :) That just feels good altogether. It's funny when you get respect and recognition and to be given things simply because they are giving you a chance to shine --- it's just funny to feel this when for so long I was treated so badly. My boss asked me to lunch and we ate at the casino buffet. At first I kept thinking, what did I do wrong? Am I in trouble this quick? This was from my thinking at my last job --- and it really was just to explain how they work and what questions I had. It really was a great meeting and we chatted about a lot of things. He's really a nice boss -- he makes sure that you're happy. This man must've been in sales before, though he seem geniune. As in - do good work for me and I will do good for you. And I'm sure if I do badly, I will know it from many. So far, I really, truly am happy in my career! I know it's my "third day on the job" ... I haven't run into anything so terrible - just that fact that things take FOREVER. As in my slow computer, waiting for upgrade (new imac!) and software. It's a lot of jumping to Pc to Mac (have two computers on my desk). It's slightly annoying, but I can work with it just fine. Besides this, hubby is very jealous. I would be too. He wants to leave his job so bad and he gets in these moods where he seems so frustrated. I don't know what to do. They won't hire him - there are no jobs there - and I don't have the luxury of looking on the net all day. I'm to busy! And today and lately I've been feeling odd about the whole baby thing. I do want a child, but with my new job, I wish I could wait a few months. Granted we have not had sex for nearly a month now (wow!) ... I think it's a mental thing with me. I WANT a baby, but not right now. But I don't want to wait, but ... but ... but .... I just haven't figured it all out yet. There isn't much longer that I can claim that I'm tired or feeling sick. I can tell when he's wanting it and lately it's been a lot. Not that I blame him ... but mentally, I feel so very worried that if we do, I'll get pregnant merely because right now I don't want to be!!! How funny is that? Before I was ready to go, now I'm not? Typical gemini. I reckon' that I'd like to slowly try come July and August. More towards August --- September-ish. I have 90 days before whatever kicks in ... so that's a while --- as in --- I really don't want to get pregnant in these here 90 days. So August would be most idea. I really don't think that I'll get pregnant this quick due to my issues. Though taking my NPC and vitex --- really helped my period last month. :) I am going to take the cream again this month (fuck when do I even take it??) And add SOY in AUGUST. I read that taking soy ivoflavins (sp?) ... leads to getting pregnant in something like 75% of women! Yikes! So I'm going to bide my time right now, though it's scary as I think I'm ready to ovulate (I hope that I am) .... And then back on my cream to help me keep my numbers up. Ugh, it was a nice break from the whole fertility thing, but now that I am getting back into it, I feel so out of it all over again. Also my weight has crept up. I don't know exactly HOW since I've been busting my ass lately, but I'm going to try to eat less and exercise. No more diets, I don't have the time to devote. I'm going to try the - no fat/gallbladder and eat less (portion control) and drink more water "diet." Oh well I feel grumpy now and going to go hit the sack. Lord I must drink more water, way to much pop lately! When did that happen? 9:54 p.m. - 2008-06-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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