sourgurl77's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Good times. I'm feeling sort of blah. I've been looking at my bbt chart and realized that I don't think I ovulated? I'm so very confused by it all, last month I "supposedly" ovulated but then two days later spotted, then start my period. I really don't know anymore about my ol' body. This month, I've reached some peak lows, and figured I was going to ovulate - especially since for the past 2 days I've had cramping. But today, I got up w/o taking my temperature, but took it anyway and found another drop. WTF? So I figure maybe TODAY did ovulate and tomorrow my temp will rise. I see that my luteral phase isn't good at all. Only three high days then a drop last month. You need at least 10 days to sustain a pregnancy. Sometimes I wonder why women twice my size get pregnant with ease. While me, I've always been ODD down there. At least I got my period last month and right now, I'm back on my progrestrone cream until... I don't know. I guess 14 days or until my period starts. Next month I'm not going to try for a baby - however if it happens, it happens. I'd rather try in August and definately September and so on. Then I'm in the "safe" zone of working at my new job at least a year and my FMLA kicking in for birth. But a nagging part of me still feels like I'll be at the gyn's office in October begging to be put on something and start fertility treatments of SOME sort. Ah, but when today, right now, I have a dull age in my ovaries. This, I wonder, is this ovulation? Or gas? Or what? It only seems to happen during the time I SHOULD be ovulating, or is this because of the cream? Ugh. Ugh. UGH. OH WELL. The bright part of my day was how I realized that working with two young girls, who are thin, is very good for me. To see what they eat and such. I don't overeat with them, etc. They make me want to be young(er) again, and funny how they worry about fashion, shoes, makeup and boys. Been there done that. But I find myself trying to dress better, look better and lose weight. I guess I'm trying to "fit in" with them, they readily accept me, which is very nice. They also believe that I'm there age (25 and 27). I am 31, but they thought I was 25 too!!!! So ah. I also am very happy that my stress level is so very DOWN. I find myself smiling a lot and in a general easy-going mood. Also, the folks that work there, I swear, everyone talks to you, "hello, how are you? Good morning" etc. So odd sometimes. The newspaper biz, made me a rough person, this place is making me a respective business woman. Good times. 8:08 p.m. - 2008-06-20 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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